We can stop telling God how big our storm is,

and start telling the storm how big our God is.

Travis and I now have 4 years of grandparenting under our belt.  There's always lots to know and learn -- we want to be really GOOD GP's, and that's a fact.  We do our best to obey the rules:  don't give A&Z candy, cokes, etc, and we try to put them down for their naps on schedule.  We try to be consistent, like Nick and Sherri, and provide loving structure for them when we are with them.  I think we do pretty good.  Now mind you, this isn't about how much we LOVE Avalon and Zaiden, because that goes into infinity....but we don't want to be too lenient with the children, then their parents have trouble with them when we leave.

Well, I was at our local watering hole (Granny's) a few days ago.  A woman that I know came in with her 17 month old grandchild.  While waiting for the child's grilled cheese sandwich to be prepared, she got her a small bag of cookies to eat!!  You will NEVER guess what she did next.  I am serious!!!  I had gotten a cup of coffee, nice and fresh, and this gal got up and fixed this 17 MONTH old baby a cup of coffee to go with her cookies!  The little girl had tea in her sippy cup, but gramma gave her a glass cup 1/2 full of coffee.  One Splenda and 1 creamer!!!

Now, after seeing this I have come to the conclusion that Travis and I aren't doing too badly at ALL!!!!  If you agree, you may feel free to comment.  If you disagree, well, I just can't hear you, 'kay?

Warmth flows through me like a gentle current.  Thoughts, feelings, and sensations pulse around me and through me.  I feel loved and cared for....This is not what I expected.  Not at all. Actually, I am not sure what I thought to find here, in this house that has drawn me to it like a moth to a flame.  When I was six years old my grandparents both died in this house, in this room.  My father's job had taken us far away from this tiny Mississippi town, but we came back for the funerals.  In my child's mind this home was akin to a castle.  Lots of rooms, with nooks and crannies - perfect for hide-and-seek with my cousins.  But my grandparents were murdered here, in their sleep, and the perpetrator of that devastation was never caught.  My father and his siblings lived with this agony, and longed for the closure of seeing justice meted out.

The house was sold, although it took two years for the cheerful, earnest realtor to charm anyone into buying it.  Of course no one from Sawbuck would consider purchasing the home, but eventually a new doctor was recruited into town, and the beautiful old home once again had a family, with all that entails, humming life into it.  But things happened.  What things?  No one could say for sure, but the young doctor with his lovely wife and 3 year old twins lasted less than 6 months.  The house stayed vacant for four years, then a banker purchased it.  He had transferred to Sawbuck from the corporate offices in Madison.  He was divorced, and his three children visited him every other weekend.  He lasted two months.  He actually moved into the Super 8 Motel on Highway 28 until he could get an apartment. 

This was the pattern for the next few years.  No one could live there.  Strange things happened there, and the people that left it didn't talk.  The house, once beautiful, fell into disrepair.  Neighborhood children sometimes threw rocks at the windows, and made dares (yes, even double-dog dares) to see if anyone would go into the house alone.

My life had been very pleasant, very straightforward, and virtually stress-free, until I turned 30.  Although I could only recall being in my grandparents home a couple of times for visits I began to dream about the house.  Thus began my compulsion....that is all I can think to call it.  .  Rose-colored glasses were for other people, I saw things so clearly:  black and white.  Numbers, facts, and figures.  Accounting, for me, was the perfect career choice, and I embraced the structure and the balance of being a CPA.  So, when I reached my thirtieth birthday and began having extremely vivid dreams about my grandparents home no one was more surprised than I.  I dreamt of things that I could not possibly had any knowledge of:  afternoon teas, picnics under the oaks, the tweet of baby bluejays from their nest in the fig tree.  These did not feel like dreams, they felt like MEMORIES, and my logical, precise, analytical mind knew that I had no such memories.

We just had a marvelous week in sunny Goose Creek, SC, the newest Spring Break Hot Spot.  For no charge, we were regaled with live entertainment the entire week!  Avalon and Zaiden allowed us to join them on their Pirate Ship, the only pre-requisite being that you must shout "Aye Aye Captain!" on command.  Since Zaidey was the Captain, he was pretty easygoing on that  part.  We caught fish, searched for Treasure with the telescope, and generally had a high old time.  We went for rides/walks around the neighborhood.  Avalon can ride so fast on her Dora tricycle that I sometimes had to jog to keep up.  She worried about losing PawPaw and Zaidey, so she carried her sidewalk chalk and marked a trail for them.  She is VERY thoughtful.  Zaidey, on the other hand, tried to get Granny arrested.  We were playing outside and he took off running across the neighbors yard.  I HAD to get him, and as I was gaining on him he started yelling "HELP! HELP!"  I would NOT have been surprised for the police to have shown up to save Zaidey and arrest the child abductor (me).  We played at the Park on Daniel Island, we went for long walks, we colored, we blew LOTS of bubbles, we read, we cooked, we played CARS a LOT, and we watched Scooby Doo!
Nick and Sherri treated us out to Yamoto Japanese Steak House for Travis' birthday (he even got to hit the gong), and again at Applebees for lunch on the day we left.  Not to mention that they also cooked for us, and we watched a fabulous "new release" movie every night.  And uh, yeah, maybe had a glass of Scuppernong Blush, which is a delightful wine!  We are so proud of Nick and Sherri.  For the home they've built, and the life they're making for themselves, and for our beautiful, brilliant grandchildren that they are rearing.....we love you, and we miss you...

Goose Creek, here we come.  The pictures that Sherri posted are so precious, we cannot wait to get there and hold Avalon and Zaiden...they are the light of our life!

I am slaving away on my next lecture, which pertains to The Ear.  Seems pretty simple and straightforward, but of course it isn't.  I'm sitting here with my Medical-surgal Textbook, an Anatomy and Physiology textbook, a Medical dictionary..and the Internet!

Friday night I asked the ER crew to give me some examples of things/items they have seen removed from ears during their career.  The most frequent items were beads and rocks.  Hair beads were #1 by far.  There were other things including crayons, Q-tips, screws or other metal objects, food items such as peas, and BUGS!! Yes, hearing their "removing a Roach from your ear" stories was pretty dang interesting.  Sometimes you can hold a flashlight to the ear and the bug will come to the light, or you can pour mineral oil or lidocaine into the ear which suffocates the insect for easy removal.

Another big thing, which is infrequent but DANGEROUS, is tiny batteries.  You know, like the ones that come in Children's books?  Well, if they put that in their ear it must come out ASAP. 

I'm reading New Moon, and I like it.  Heard that it is very slow and hard to get into, but I'm a tad on the odd side, so I'm not having that problem with it!

We ended 2008 fantastically.  Nick, Sherri, Avalon, and Zaiden were here from Tuesday until Saturday Christmas week, then we all loaded up and caravaned to Goose Creek.  Travis and I stayed there from Saturday until Thursday afternoon.  We did not make the 12 hour drive straight through...we both have joint problems/pain so it is easier on us to break it up.

I cried like a baby when we left, as I always do.  Travis actually tears up, but wouldn't confess to crying.  Nick and Sherri make us feel so welcome.  Their house is so big that we really are still able to have our own space, which isn't the case when they're here.  Here we have 2 bedrooms and one bathroom, although we have turned our sunroom into a small bedroom for Avalon.  We're all kind of "up close and personal".  Travis and I like it, because the kids can pounce on us any time they want to!

Avalon is amazing.  She is so intelligent, it is just amazing to watch her thought processes.  Sherri and I took her with us on a walk, and she rode her "bicycle" which is actually like a Big Wheel (Dora).  That kid is strong, and she could definitely keep up!  Zaiden kept us in stitches.  He loves to do anything that causes him to get dizzy!  And that boy can run!  He is incredibly fast, and loves to run circles around the house.  He would jabber away, sounds like Chinese, then pop out words or a phrase that was totally correct.  He is a bit of a daredevil, and you just can't turn your back on him!  Sherri & Nick have decided he is going to have a bump on his head and a busted lip continuously for the next few years.  And he ADORES his PawPaw.  Of course Travis just ate that up!  Avalon seems pretty even on her affections, but Zaid could not get enough of Travis, which was SO cute

It will be awfully quiet around here.  Nobody running in our room at 0700 yelling "Granny, PawPaw, it's SUNNY!  You have to get up NOW, it's sunny outside!!!

To Nick and Sherri:  We are so proud of you two.  You have a beautiful home, you are wonderful hosts, and your children are the light of our life.  Thank you for having us over, we love you!

I've just talked with Sherri, and she thinks they ARE going to get to come for at least a few days at Christmas.  My heart is singing with gladness!  I SO want to see Avalon and Zaiden receive their gift from Santa at my parents' house.....and just have all our family under one roof at Christmas!

Oh, now I must run out and kill the Fatted Calf.  Uh, Angela, if you're reading this, I meant "Go get some tofu!"

Things are going pretty good at school.  I certainly don't have everything "down pat" and continue to have to take lots of stuff home to get it finished.  Grading careplans/charting/pathophysiology etc from Clinical takes the most time.  Got to see new babies Camryn and Natalie last weekend, they're adorable.  Get to see lots of pictures of new Mainiac great-nephew Tommy (lives in Maine, hence Mainiacs).  Dana finally is seeing a dermatologist in Jackson today for a recurring (since childhood) skin problem.  Went to Hammond yesterday afternoon to see Rheumatologist, for follow-up, but left at 5pm without seeing her.  There were still 3 people ahead of me, and one was a new patient, so I figured I didn't want to be sitting there at 7pm, and rescheduled.

Greatly miss Avalon and Zaiden, Nick and Sherri.  Not sure when our next visit will be, but I need to be finding out so Travis and I have something to look forward to.  Got to go now, have a meeting downstairs.  Just had a thought hit me "Did I put on deodorant this morning?"  Well, I guess I'll find out in a few minutes!

Here we are, another Hurricane Day.  I worked a 12 hour shift at the hospital last night (after an 8 hour shift at school), and I've seen very little weather report....but my heart goes out to Texas!  We are quite some distance from the eye of the storm -- about a 10 hour drive -- and the winds here are fierce.  Yes FIERCE, once again.  I am thankful for the 2 mighty oaks that were cut this past week, but we have several more that are within EASY striking distance of our house.  This house was built in 1939, and these oaks are probably that old as well.  The have stood beautifully well for these many years, but since Hurricane Katrina they've dropped like flies.  I hate that, and I hate to see them cut.  It is quite eerie to sit in this house, hear the walls and floors creak with the force of the winds....the wind chimes are delirious, and the oaks are howling.  Unless you're into horror movies (Nick) this isn't a sound that is comforting or comfortable!

Have you any thoughts on WHY we are being hit with these hurricanes so frequently?  They just seem to be getting closer and closer together.  And I know Gustav was seriously downplayed because the damage was NOTHING like Katrina.  However, if you had 10 large trees down in your yard it would likely not seem so inconsequential.....

After having been rather critical of the weather, I must say that the storms are beautiful in their fury.

I barely know where to start....everything is so new.  I am loving my job as an instructor in the Nursing Program at SMCC.  I have had lots of computer issues, though.  I have tried to use Blackboard, which is an awesome tool (assuming you have a CLUE what you are doing).  The teachers have a CD with a power point outline for each chapter.  We use this during our lectures, but we also post it in Blackboard for the students.  You do NOT want to post the power point, it takes WAY too much ink for them to print it out...and some must do that if they don't have a computer at home or they want to keep it with them to study.  All the ones who have helped me were great, then I would come back to my office and try it.  Nothing.  They don't have Vista.  I do, and the options are NOT the same.  I am still working on it.
Next I have never used Outlook for my e-mail.  I've always used Outlook Express.  I made lots of folders, one for each of the sophomore instructors, and I save the emails.  Well, I cannot find the %$^! folders!  I am serious!  I can go to an email, right click, go to "move to folder" and click and it will bring up all those names....but I couldn't ACCESS the folders.  My son called today while I was out running an errand and I just burst into tears.  I have so much reading and preparation for class, a million new forms to use, we're starting our clinical rotations next week, I had Drug Calculation questions due, plus test questions for our next exam...and I haven't slept well for days because it is so hot at my house.  Still the No Power r/t Gustav issue.
Well, Nick is just my hero.  First for listening to me blather about the computer problems......well, he just listened and then I felt a lot better.  He told me what to do on the email issue and I tried it when I came back and I found my missing folders!
So, to anyone who chances to read this......thank God for Nick, and I surely do miss my son.  Of course, it is actually his fault that I don't know much about computers, 'cause he just fixes things for me.  I'm getting better...and I'm sure he's glad.

Also, I cranked our generator at home ALL BY MYSELF yesterday!  I'm off to work my night shift at the hospital.  Sleep is probably overrated anyway....

Last night I got a phone call from my nephew Tommy Roper & his wife Jess in Limestone Maine.  They had just gotten home from the hospital and brought their beautiful 2-day old son, Thomas Andrew Roper, home.  I listened as they each, in turn, gave me a report on the total exquisteness and uniqueness and the total BEAUTY of this infant.  Now pictures have been received and they are, in fact, quite right in their assessment of what a handsome fellow he is.  Jess made a very interesting statement, "I love to hold Tommy, look into his beautiful face, see the miracle of life that he is....and I love my husband more every time I look at my baby."  How beautiful is that?

They stopped at a WalMart on their way home, to pick up just a few more things (who doesn't?) and Jess went in and Tom sat in the back seat with Tommy.  When she came out he was sitting there telling the baby about his MawMaw Margie -- how very badly she wanted a grandbaby, that he would have been the joy and light of her life.....and telling the baby that he is named after his Daddy and his Uncle Andy, who would have adored him......

To Margie:  I will love Tommy, and cherish him, and provide him with that "down south" heritage.  I will hold your grandbaby, and love your grandbaby..........and I'll be the best substitute Grammaw that I can....but I won't do this alone.  You let that baby get close enough, and Gloria and Georgia and I will put some lovin' on him.  When he gets big enough we'll tell him a few tales of our Sister Adventures, too.  He won't grow up in a house full of kids like we did, and the cold wind won't whistle through the holes in the floor, and he probably won't swim in ponds and creeks --- but we're sure going to tell him those stories.  Sorry you aren't here to add to 'em.....I will miss you always.  My heart aches for the beauty of YOU that little Tommy will never know.................................................................

I am slmost through preparing my first lecture, which is due Monday 8/25/08.  I am loving this school-teaching business.  Of course, these aren't small children -- or any other age group--- that doesn't WANT to be here.  These folks have chosen a profession, and are eager to get on with it.  And I must say it is very challenging and difficult for them, so they've got to be pretty darn dedicated.  One individual just told me that she has 3 children at home, ages 6,4, and 3 ---so I am suitably impressed.  Of course, she probably doesn't get much sleep because there is NO WAY you could study until those children are in bed!

My office is about halfway organized.  It is so incredibly tiny that I cannot find a place for a lot of my stuffs!  Well, that is the story of my life, apparently.

Anyway I must go now, I am working a 12 hour night shift tonight, so I am using comp time to take off at noon so I can go home and hopefully catch some ZZZZ's!!!

Nick was keeping Avalon and Zaiden while Sherri was at work.  I said "oh, how's the babysitting going?" or something equally as genius.  BABYSITTING?????  Nick promptly informed me "Mom, you don't babysit your own kids."  Nobody ever asks a Mom how the babysitting (of her own kids) is going!!!  One of the nurses in Labor & Delivery was telling me that her husband called the other day and was whining because he had to "babysit" the kids!!!!  It is possible that he has a new...uh orifice.  To say that she was displeased with him...yeah.

I don't believe that children are the Mom's sole responsibility, and I admire the heck out of the younger generation of parents ~~~ they are much more equal partners in parenting ( in most cases).  My generation was not like that, and regardless of whether you worked or not the children were the Mom's "job/responsibility".  How weird is that?  

Do you ever hear the Dad ask the Mom "Can you watch little Suzy & Junior Saturday morning for an hour?"  Nope.  It's a given that she'll be watching them....but you STILLL see the Mom ask the Dad IF they can watch their own child?!?!?!?  I don't like this!
Your thoughts?

I just got off the phone with Nick and Avalon, with Sherri and Zaid in the background.  While we were talking I looked at his last LJ post, with fantastic pics of his children...and I just love it.  Nick and Sherri are both excellent writers, and they both should post every day so I can read it!  It makes the 800 miles not seem quite so far~~~~
On another note I went to a Rheumatoligist this past Wednesday.  I have had a wicked flare-up of fibromyalgia.  This Dr. had never seen me before, and she agreed that I definitely have fibromyalgia, but when I described my pain and she checked my joints and stuff she thinks I have rheumatoid arthritis.  She ordered a ton of blood work that I could get done in McComb and have the results faxed to her.  I decided to wait and have it done Monday when I go back to work.  I'm also having trouble with my left eye.  it is extremely, horribly dry and it hurts! When I wake up in the morning, or during the night, it is stuck shut.  I have some ointment that looks like Vaseline that I have to use every night now.  Yuck!  I went to eye doctor Tuesday and he put me on steroid drops for my eye.  My pressure was good, etc (no glaucoma) and I go back to him in one month. Having what is basically a throbbing headache in your stupid eye is no fun!   Dr. Spady said the pain and dryness can be r/t the fibromyalgia.  She gave me two shots.  I am scared of needles, but I was very brave!

Well, enough of this stupid, depressing crap.....Nick, Sherri, Avalon and Zaid will be here in less than 2 weeks!

Travis had his lumbar laminectomy with fusion yesterday morning.  The procedure that was supposed to take about 30 minutes took almost 2 hours.  There was a deformity in his vertebra at L5/S1 and the doctor repaired that, etc.  The incision is about 6" long, and he had a drain last night.  We stayed at Southern Bone & Joint.  They have 2 rooms to keep overnight patients, but he was the only one.  He had 1:1 nursing, plus there was a nursing student from USM there until 11pm, then a nursing student from William Carey was there from 11p till 0700.  They are getting some VERY good experience, and I definitely admire them for working while being in nursing school -- because that is hard.

The drive home this morning was very rough.  Travis was in quite a bit of pain.  Driving 70, the ride takes one hour and 45 minutes.  I drove 50, 1) so I wouldn't jar him as much, and 2) because it was foggy.  The drive took close to 3 hours.  We stopped to get his pain medication prescription filled, but our regular drugstore, CVS, didn't have any Percocet.  We went to Super D to get it filled, and the doctor hadn't written a strength, so they had a call in to him.  He was in surgery, so we came on home and my sister Gloria picked it up and brought it here this afternoon.

He cannot move from a lying to sitting position, or a sitting to standing position without help.  He is getting up and moving around, then he rests for a couple of hours.  Every time he gets up he is in excrutiating pain for at least 10-15 minutes.  I feel so helpless!  He is taking his pain med and muscle relaxer right on time, and he is okay -- until he moves.  Hopefully this will get better in the next couple of days.  I called in to work tomorrow.  No way can I leave him here alone when he can't get up!  Bob would help, but he's just a dumb chihuahua, so he doesn't really contribute much to the overall well-being of the family.  As a matter of fact, he whizzed in the floor twice today.  He had better watch out, or I might drop him off at a Chinese restaurant!

Things have been pretty hectic at work, which is certainly not unusual.  Travis' Dad hasn't been feeling good at all, and we've been over there twice.  Also helped them get set up with an appointment for a nephrologist.  It is just too hard for them to drive 85 miles to the doctor.

Travis came out to the hospital yesterday and had his lab work, EKG, and chest x-ray done in preparation for his back surgery Monday.  Hopefully we'll just stay overnight and get to come home on Tuesday.  

We're getting a total exterior upgrade at work, and it is really freaky to look out a 6th floor window and see people scurrying around on a "swinging scaffold".  It scares me to WATCH them!

We've got lots of stuff coming up:  the surgery, the lithotrypsy, Thanksgiving, the Day-After-Thanksgiving-Shop-Till-You-Drop Extravaganza, etc., but we are getting so excited knowing Nick, Sherri, Avalon, and Zaiden will be here on Dec. 26th.  I'm ready to start decorating for Christmas!  We miss them all, but thankfully we're able to talk to them by phone every day or two.  Even Avalon graces us with lively conversation (for about 30 seconds).  The other day she was in the background and yelled "Avalon to the Rescue!!!!!!!!!!!11"  And Zaiden laughs out loud for us sometimes!  

Life is good!